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Reaching Your Goals: Ensuring Immediate Feedback
(created January 27, 2020)

man holding a laminated sheet with a mind map written on it in marker

Like clear goals, feedback is a barometer upon which you can measure your progress. It is how you determine if you are approaching your target, or veered off course. Feedback is also how you orient yourself toward your goal. Self monitoring is essential. For example, if the goal is to master the task of baking the perfect edification of a key lime pie, allowing other bakers/cooks/family to taste the pie is likely to let you know. . READ MORE

Setting Your Challenges Just Right: The right amount of challenge
(created January 27, 2020)

You are setting goals and trying to achieve peak performance, great!  While you are trying to stay iin the zone, or achieving "flow", let's examine some important processes (i.e., essential factors) that impact achieving "flow". Flow activities, by their very nature, must be challenging. In order to exercise your skills, expand your capacities, and surpass your limits, you must face some degree of challenge. However, in order for flow to occur, the challenge barometer must be set just right. READ MORE

Overcoming Obstacles
(created November 18, 2019)

Person balancing on logs

I thought it might be helpful to begin thinking about the internal processes of doubt.  Negative thinking, negative internal dialogues, or roadblocks in our mind, can interfere with achieving our goal.   Sometimes our anxiety can get the best of us and immobilize us.  Don't panic...stay the course!!!!.   Staying in the zone or "flow" can be used to help transform setbacks into opportunities for growth.  READ MORE

Keeping It Real: Setting Realistic Goals
(created October 1, 2019)

You're getting ready to set a goal. Whether it is self improvement or learning a new skill set, there are a few things you should be aware of when goal setting for an optimal experience. It is important to take a brutally honest self assessment when goal setting. What are your current skills in relation to the new goal you are trying to achieve?  Is this a personal challenge, a novel idea, and do you currently have the resources  ..... READ MORE

Looking Within: Staying Focused and Present
(created September 17, 2019)

Sometimes clients express frustration or "getting stuck" when setting goals, staying motivated when completing a task, or procrastinating under time deadline.  With the world moving fast and instantly changing often find ourselves being impatient and come to expect instantaneous images, video, texts, solutions to problems, and various other snippets of information..... READ MORE

Don't Believe Everything You Think
(created May 27, 2019)

Let’s say one of your best friends announce his/her engagement and your immediate internal response is sadness and maybe even anger. The thought that follows is a painful blow to the self: “I’ll never find someone.” And then you feel guilty for your emotions and thoughts and wonder why you can’t just be happy for your friend. And of course you are! Feeling happy for your friend and sad for yourself can coexist. This is normal. The thought that you’ll never find someone is likely a self-defeating belief and should best be looked at with some compassionate curiosity.... READ MORE


Self Reflection
(created March 18, 2019)

It is so easy to get caught up in the day-to day aspects of life and forget to pause, reflect, and look at the bigger picture. Slowing down and taking time to think about your life is extremely helpful in creating a better sense of you are, who you want to be, and how you will get there. Be present. Be in the moment of the here-and-now. Lets take a mental break, a moment of silence, or have a moment of pause... READ MORE


Cultural and Social Isolation
(created March 11, 2019)

Cultural isolation is so pervasive in our culture. Many of us remember when times when we used to have extended families, spiritual meeting places (i.e., synagogues, mosque, temples, and churches), workplace, and our neighborhoods where we felt a sense of community.  We often don't do that now.  Two parent families are the exception rather than the rule.  There aren't many places where we can feel safe enough just to be who we are... READ MORE

I Am Changing: Changing Life Habits
(created February 11, 2019)

Your constant struggle with balancing life can impact your overall health. For example, business management researchers and psychologists consistently find that work and family conflict is associated with depression, anxiety, emotional strain, overall health, and general dissatisfaction with life. Some researchers have found that work and family conflict is associated with high blood pressure and high cholesterol levels while other researchers have found a relationship between conflict and unhealthy behaviors, such as lack of exercise and poor dietary choices... READ MORE

Compassion Fatigue
(created January 28, 2019)

Compassion fatigue is commonly known in the healthcare profession as the cost of caring for others with emotional or physical pain. Compassion fatigue is also a friendly term that can be used for many family members, partners, and/or care providers experiencing secondary traumatic stress disorder... READ MORE

Creating Positive Change
(created January 7, 2019)


Creating positive changes in your life is tough. It can be scary. We fear the unknown, fear failure, even fear success. Fear may be the greatest obstacle to change. Our thinking styles tends to be more negative... READ MORE 


Creating Healthy Connections and Happiness: Looking Beyond the Body and Seeing the Person
(created December 9, 2018)


As soon as we open up our eyes in the morning, stories are running in our minds that influence the way we see people. We have preconceptions about who our spouse, kids, co-workers, or partners are. When we walk out the door and into our community, we already have preconceived ideas about our neighbors, baristas, grocery store clerk, colleagues, and even strangers who are walking up the street... READ MORE 


Another Look At Stress: Biofeedback
(created June 12, 2018)


Biofeedback gives you the power to use your thoughts to control your body, often to improve a health condition or physical performance.

There are many biofeedback methods that can be used for stress... READ MORE 



Another Look At Stress: A New Framework
(created June 5, 2018)

stressed woman​​​​​Cutting-edge research has given us some new insights into the science of stress and its effects on our emotional and physical health. Cognitive-behaviorist, mindfulness researchers, and neuropsychologists have been re-focusing on the construct of  "eustress", or physiological aspects of stress, originally introduced by endocrinologist Dr. Han Selye in the 1960s.  These researchers have been re-examining the positive response, or adaptation, to stress... READ MORE 




Another Look At Stress: Making Stress Work
(created May 29, 2018)

three men laughing together​​​​​In the game of life we are constantly trying to do what matters. Intense, or high levels of stress, is not healthy for you, but, daily or "perceived stress" always exist and having no stress is just not possible. Life without stress can be a life of "nonexistence" in which nothing really matters. Your goal when trying to understand your relationship with stress is to figure out how to manage it effectively; how to use it to build and support a meaningful, resilient life. If not, you can become consumed, overwhelmed, and immobilized with stress... READ MORE 




It Just Gets Better with Time
(Created  August 28, 2017)

three men laughing together​​​​​Although we may walk slower, lose our agility, experience aches and pains, and struggle remembering things, it is nice to know that we get happier with age (Stone, Schwartz, Broderick, & Dean, 2010).   Developmental researchers commonly referred to this happiness trend as the “U-Shape of Happiness”... READ MORE 




Getting By with a Little Help From My Friends: Healthy and Successful Aging
(Created  August 21, 2017)

three men laughing together​​​​​Our worlds are constantly changing, as we get older our family, social, and community structures change over time.  Loved ones may get sick and require personal care, lifestyles and priorities change, and marriages/family relationships change.   Seasons constantly change, work comes to an end, we retire, and other future plans become more important. Our lives evolve—and eventually, life comes full circle and has an end.  It is important to note, as we grow older and wiser, social relationships and activities evolve with our changing lives and should be maintained... READ MORE 




Childhood:  Knowing and Doing Better
(Created  August 14, 2017)

Man, woman, and baby hand on top of each other​​​​​As our children will be returning to school, leaving the joyful, long, hot summer days of leisure activities, digital games, and sometimes endless hours on social media, community educators and researchers have been actively involved in developing many primary intervention programs designed to promote positive and prosocial behaviors... READ MORE 




The Importance of Keeping Connected for Healthy Living and Successful Aging
(Created  August 14, 2017)

Man, woman, and baby hand on top of each other​​​​​Keeping socially connected is important to facilitate healthy and successful living at all ages.  From making new friends during childhood to establishing and maintaining social relationships in young adulthood to keeping positive individual, family, society, and community networks when we mature with age. The next few blogs will explore some important things to consider with social engagement at any age... READ MORE 



Supporting Others With Open Hands
(Created  June 26, 2017)

Man, woman, and baby hand on top of each other​​​​​Oftentimes, we are faced with many of life's challenges that make us anxious, overwhelmed, worried, and perhaps, feel a sense helplessness.  One such situation that we often feel very uncomfortable openly discussing (and sometimes can be culturally taboo) is deciding just how involved we should get when a co-worker, close family member, or friend experiences a crisis, perpetual personal problems, or difficult situation... READ MORE 


Coping With Loss Over The Holidays
(Created  December 14, 2015)

Holidays are celebratory times spent or shared with loved ones.  Since holidays involve spending time with those we love the most, if you’ve lost someone, it can be a difficult time of the year.  When you have lost someone special, your world loses its celebratory qualities... READ MORE



Healthy Relationships Over The Holidays: How Our Emotions Play an Essential Role
(created November 9, 2015)​​​​
Its that time again! We are approaching one of the most stressful times of the year, holiday times. Some of us may travel near or far in attempts to celebrate various traditions with our loves ones. Visiting with family and friends over Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Milad un Nabi, New Years and other religious observances can sometimes be like an obstacle course; navigating through emotional triggers and the emotional senstivities of others... READ MORE


A Little Bit of Kindness Can Make You Happier and Healthier!
(Created October 5, 2015)

Kindness is a simple answer in a sometimes difficult and challenging world. I know that to be true. Life happens! Sometimes things happen that can be empowering, heartfelt, loving, and humbling, or traumatic, devasting, embarrassing, and/or excruciatingly painful.  As a skilled helper in the transformational process of change, I try to help others feel better in numerous ways.  One such way involves acknowledging and appreciating all people and to encourage others to do the same... READ MORE


Healing Mind, Body, and Spirit
(created September 7, 2015)

Within all of us lies the ability to reach our full potential, to become, or self actualize:  an essence of wisdom, peace, joy, and love. When we are relating from this center (i.e., inner self), rather than from the periphery (i.e., outer self) we are honoring and validating the spiritual core of who we are. I often to refer to this as "loving the skin we're in".  To express this essence means to have  purpose in your life... READ MORE


On The Mend, Rebuilding Trust
(created August 2, 2015)

What did I do? I Didn't Mean to...

Relationships are built on trust. Relationships flourish when partners, friends, or relatives trust each other to be honest, faithful, respectful, kind, consistent and open to resolving conflict... READ MORE



I Didn’t Mean to…..Healing from Shame.
(created July 6, 2015)

Finding our way in the world does, in fact, require a healthy dose of self-reflection and focus. It requires us to look objectively at our own strengths and weaknesses…and we all have both! But working on the self should be a self-loving task, and cannot be accomplished in an atmosphere of self-depreciation, self-blame or shame. It doesn’t matter how well we perform on the job, at home, or on a skill-based task or competition. When we feel a sense of shame it tends to color the way we perceive everything... READ MORE

Setting Healthy Financial Boundaries with Family Members
(created June 1, 2015)

A common concern that is often raised by some of my clients involves the repeated requests for money from family and friends. These clients are often described as the “hub” of their families; they are hard-working, financially stable, compassionate, and value their relationships with their community, friends, and families. They report a number of mixed feelings with repeated financial requests from their relatives. Some of these reported feelings may include anger, frustration, guilt, worry, mental exhaustion, sleeping difficulties, and simply—being totally overwhelmed... READ MORE


The Balancing Act
(created May 1, 2015)

Does this sound like you? You are sitting at your desk or in your kitchen, idly glancing at your daily schedule, which is laid out in an elaborate time-management system with binders busting with "to-do" lists, phone logs, dates, meetings, play dates, and events in your Outlook, mobile organizer apps, or the latest high-tech efficiency electronic organizers charts. Suddenly, you sigh and realize that you no longer want your day to be so complicated... READ MORE


Worry Less
(created April 1, 2015)

"I will not should myself today!"

Worrying is a common thought process that involves dwelling negatively on something that is bothering you. You typically worry about situations, people, or events that you feel you have little or no control. When you worry, you tend to think about all possible negative outcomes to a situation... READ MORE


Self Nurture, Self Care
(created February 16, 2015)

Self-care does not mean being selfish. Self-nourishment means maintaining a daily routine of sufficient sleep, recreation, and downtime. Taking time for yourself provides you with the energy, presence of mind, and stamina that you need to pursue your daily activities and achieve your goals. Rest and relaxation also contributes to a calmer, more serene outlook, and thus, reducing anxiety... READ MORE


Are You Emotionally Fit?
(created January 12, 2015)

Being emotionally fit involves building emotional strength, positivity, or being resilient during puzzling, troubling, and/or disappointing times, periods of sadness, and crises. During times of stress, your emotionally fitness involves identifying and using many strengths and traits that you already possess... READ MORE


Depression and Intimacy
(created August 1, 2013)

Depression doesn't just happen to you. It happens to the people closest to us. Depression is tough on strong relationships, threatens the foundation of weaker ones, and can make forming new connections almost impossible. It doesn't matter whether depression begins as a feeling just a little down, or a feeling stuck, or totally immobilized, the result is the same... READ MORE


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